1. Put your iTunes on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 friends who might enjoy doing the same as well as the person you got the note from. (uh, only if you want to)
What is your Motto?
Pin Your Wings by Copeland
What do your friends think of you?
21 and Invincible by Something Corporate
What do you think about very often?
3685 by The Spill Canvas
What is 2+2?
So Damn Clever by Plain White T's (hahaha that just seems very funny to me especially since one of the lines is "no one can break hearts better" so true about math)
What do you think of your best friend?
Over by Sugarcult (uhoh that's no good)
What do you think of the person you like?
The Middle by Jimmy Eat World "it just takes some time/everything will be just fine"
What is your life story?
Aim Snap Fall by The Spill Canvas
What do you want to be when you grow up?
Making Love to the Camera by The Starting Line (yeah part of me still wants to be an actress)
What do you think of when you see the person you like?
Must Have Done Something Right by Relient K (yeah that's how I feel about him :) )
What do your parents think of you?
October 16th by Faulter "I guess I do the right things at all the wrong times"
What will you dance to at your wedding?
Break A Leg by The Spill Canvas "I do hear by swear a bounty on your heart"
What will they play at your funeral?
The Formal Weather Pattern by Something Corporate "you see my face as I'm dying"
What is your hobby/interest?
Autography by The Starting Line (okay there's this line that says follow the temp and I always thought it said follow the temple and yes I am VERY interested in the temple)
What is your biggest secret?
Jamie All Over by Mayday Parade "All I ever wanted was to dream another sunset with you"
What do you think of your friends?
Inside Out by Eve 6
What's the worst thing that can happen?
The Process (Tonight) by Self Against City "Our lives may never change"
How will you die?
Bedroom Talk by The Starting Line (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA)
What is the one thing you regret?
The Phrase The Pays by The Academy Is... "I've never tried to make the best of my time"
What makes you laugh?
Forgotten Not Forgiven by Just Surrender (this should be the song for question below :/ "and we both know how bad I get")
What makes you cry?
Jersey by Mayday Parade "And I should have been your everything"
Will you ever get married?
The Runaways by Anberlin
What scares you the most?
She's the Blade by Sugarcult
Does anyone like you?
Running from Lions by All Time Low
If you could go back in time, what would you change?
Jumper by Third Eye Blind
What hurts right now?
21 by The Starting Line
What will you post this as?
Make Damn Sure by Taking Back Sunday
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Monday, November 10, 2008
100 Things
1. My name means "cheerful"
2. I was born the day before my mother's birthday.
3. I LOVE the song "Kiss the Girl" from The Little Mermaid.
4. I want to get married in the Nauvoo Temple.
5. I don't care about having a wedding dress or a reception and I'm even okay not getting married at Nauvoo as long as its me and him and the temple.
6. I have a birth mark under my left arm near my armpit and every time I see it in the mirror it surprises me.
7. I love Jones Cream Soda and I collect the bottle caps.
8. I like pretty much every vegetable except brussel sprouts.
9. I'm pretty obsessed with Disney movies. The classic ones with princesses and songs.
10. Jasmine and Belle are my favorite princesses.
11. I would eat Taco Bell everyday if I could afford it.
12. I text and drive even though it makes me mad when I see other drivers doing it.
13. My favorite band is The Spill Canvas.
14. I like singing although I don't think I'm all that good at it.
15. Singing runs in my family. My grandfather has pretty much the greatest voice. At least I think so.
16. I can wear heels for about 2 seconds.
17. I'm allergic to penicillin.
18. When I was in middle school even though the doctor at Patient First knew I was allergic to penicillin he gave me amoxicillin. My right eye swelled shut because of it.
19. My favorite movie is Ever After or The Swan Princess.
20. I love Disney songs. When I used to pick up Ryan and Jack from school I would play it really loud with the windows rolled down.
21. Vegas was both the worst and best thing I ever did in my life.
22. I can't see myself ever really living there again.
23. I want to live in Chicago at some point in my life.
24. It would be cool to live in Paris at some point too.
25. I'm going to be a seminary teacher...hopefully.
26. I secretly want a girl, but I'm too scared of screwing her up so I just always say I want all boys.
27. I think it's creepy when people wink at me. I cringe and sometimes emit a tiny squeak when people do wink at me.
28. I like nerdy looking guys. I prefer Elvis Costello to Elvis Presley.
29. I want to buy a min pin after I get married. It can be like a trial run before we have kids.
30. I only let people I really like call me Lace.
31. I really have no idea about my family heritage. I think its like Sweedish and Irish and maybe some Native American.
32. I can ask lots of questions in German.
33. Though I can't understand any answers to the questions.
34. I'm studying French.
35. I like people watching.
36. I like to read wedding magazines.
37. I prefer Jay Leno to David Letterman.
38. I like rain and thunderstorms. Living in Vegas I got sick of sunshine and happiness and yearned for storms and gloominess at least once a week.
39. If I go to a movie I have to sit in the middle because it annoys me when people walk by me during the movie.
40. I get sick about once a year. And when I get sick I get deathly sick.
41. I have allergies most of the year.
42. I've been to three weddings. Two were my parents and the other my best friend Katrina.
43. I wish I knew how to drum.
44. Instead my favorite hobby is air drumming. I'm pretty spectacular.
45. I'm of the firm opinion that the drummer is the hottest member of any band. Even if he's not that hot the drums make him hotter.
46. My favorite color is green.
47. Almost everything I own is green.
48. I could have been named Rachel Elizabelth and been called Liz if my mom had named me.
49. I've never ever wanted to change my name.
50. My favorite book is Prince Charming. My grandma bought it for me and it was sitting on my bed when I went to visit her once. Now that I'm Mormon I just skip over the naughty parts.
51. I don't care much for ice cream unless its Ben and Jerry's and even then I have to be "in the mood".
52. Same for popcorn.
53. I am the oldest, but I've always wanted an older brother.
54. I like turbulence on a plane ride.
55. Lilacs are my favorite flower
56. I have to play spider solitaire if I get on the computer.
57. Sometimes when I try to write all I really end up doing is staring at what I've already written before closing the document and taking a break.
58. My first memory is living in an apartment somewhere and pushing the Christmas tree off the balcony after Christmas.
59. It actually makes me sick when someone is pulling out the seeds of a pumpkin. I cannot stand the smell. But I like eating pumpkin seeds.
60. I HATE it when people leave shopping carts in the parking lot in random spots.
61. If I could have plastic surgery on anything it would be my chin.
62. I like driving.
63. I buy hair ties and take one out of the package and then lose the package.
64. Then the elastic wears out of my hair tie and I have to buy a whole new package.
65. I always put the lid down after being in the bathroom because I lived with Aunt Jane for three years.
66. When I get a house I'm having my own bathroom because I can't stand sharing with anyone.
67. I have crazy dreams.
68. I always tell my roommates about them in the morning.
69. My life would be miserable without my roommates and the rest of the girls in Normandy.
70. I chew gum when I'm running late and forget to brush my teeth.
71. I'm terrified of spending the winter in Idaho because the snow and I don't get along very well.
72. I like taking walks at night.
73. I love star gazing.
74. Camping is my favorite thing to do to "get away".
75. I miss the Quiner family more than I would miss oxygen if I was drowning.
76. I try to avoid wearing skirts as much as possible.
77. When I have to wear a skirt I wear shorts under it.
78. One of my favorite things about being Mormon is the fact temples GLOW!
79. I rarely ever wear jewelry.
80. Except for my CTR ring which is in French.
81. If I could retake any subject in school it would be Science.
82. I'm horrible at holding a job and I don't really know why.
83. I tell myself its because I like change.
84. Nothing cheers me up more than watching Ever After or The Swan Princess.
85. My first girl will be named Mirabel Ann and my first boy will be named Ross McKay after my brothers Ryan and Jack.
86. Sometimes I get the urge to name my kids after Disney prince's and princess's.
87. If I could be anywhere right now I would choose right where I am.
88. I eat about one meal a day and that's usually around ten at night before going to bed.
89. I still own pillowcases from when I was really little.
90. I love spring and fall.
91. I'm a Cancer and to a tee. I can be very shy but very outgoing too and I have really bad mood swings.
92. I love my dad's spaghetti sauce even though it has sausage in it.
93. I love peanut butter M&M's
94. I wish they still sold Fun Dip at 7-11
95. I don't care about what's "in style" I wear what I like.
96. I believe everyone should have a second chance and everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt.
97. Even on my very worst day when I scream that I wish I'd never let the missionaries into my apartment, I love being Mormon.
98. I believe you can't go wrong when your smiling.
99. I believe my Heavenly Father loves me even when I feel like no one else does.
100. I'm pretty excited about the whole getting my own planet thing.
2. I was born the day before my mother's birthday.
3. I LOVE the song "Kiss the Girl" from The Little Mermaid.
4. I want to get married in the Nauvoo Temple.
5. I don't care about having a wedding dress or a reception and I'm even okay not getting married at Nauvoo as long as its me and him and the temple.
6. I have a birth mark under my left arm near my armpit and every time I see it in the mirror it surprises me.
7. I love Jones Cream Soda and I collect the bottle caps.
8. I like pretty much every vegetable except brussel sprouts.
9. I'm pretty obsessed with Disney movies. The classic ones with princesses and songs.
10. Jasmine and Belle are my favorite princesses.
11. I would eat Taco Bell everyday if I could afford it.
12. I text and drive even though it makes me mad when I see other drivers doing it.
13. My favorite band is The Spill Canvas.
14. I like singing although I don't think I'm all that good at it.
15. Singing runs in my family. My grandfather has pretty much the greatest voice. At least I think so.
16. I can wear heels for about 2 seconds.
17. I'm allergic to penicillin.
18. When I was in middle school even though the doctor at Patient First knew I was allergic to penicillin he gave me amoxicillin. My right eye swelled shut because of it.
19. My favorite movie is Ever After or The Swan Princess.
20. I love Disney songs. When I used to pick up Ryan and Jack from school I would play it really loud with the windows rolled down.
21. Vegas was both the worst and best thing I ever did in my life.
22. I can't see myself ever really living there again.
23. I want to live in Chicago at some point in my life.
24. It would be cool to live in Paris at some point too.
25. I'm going to be a seminary teacher...hopefully.
26. I secretly want a girl, but I'm too scared of screwing her up so I just always say I want all boys.
27. I think it's creepy when people wink at me. I cringe and sometimes emit a tiny squeak when people do wink at me.
28. I like nerdy looking guys. I prefer Elvis Costello to Elvis Presley.
29. I want to buy a min pin after I get married. It can be like a trial run before we have kids.
30. I only let people I really like call me Lace.
31. I really have no idea about my family heritage. I think its like Sweedish and Irish and maybe some Native American.
32. I can ask lots of questions in German.
33. Though I can't understand any answers to the questions.
34. I'm studying French.
35. I like people watching.
36. I like to read wedding magazines.
37. I prefer Jay Leno to David Letterman.
38. I like rain and thunderstorms. Living in Vegas I got sick of sunshine and happiness and yearned for storms and gloominess at least once a week.
39. If I go to a movie I have to sit in the middle because it annoys me when people walk by me during the movie.
40. I get sick about once a year. And when I get sick I get deathly sick.
41. I have allergies most of the year.
42. I've been to three weddings. Two were my parents and the other my best friend Katrina.
43. I wish I knew how to drum.
44. Instead my favorite hobby is air drumming. I'm pretty spectacular.
45. I'm of the firm opinion that the drummer is the hottest member of any band. Even if he's not that hot the drums make him hotter.
46. My favorite color is green.
47. Almost everything I own is green.
48. I could have been named Rachel Elizabelth and been called Liz if my mom had named me.
49. I've never ever wanted to change my name.
50. My favorite book is Prince Charming. My grandma bought it for me and it was sitting on my bed when I went to visit her once. Now that I'm Mormon I just skip over the naughty parts.
51. I don't care much for ice cream unless its Ben and Jerry's and even then I have to be "in the mood".
52. Same for popcorn.
53. I am the oldest, but I've always wanted an older brother.
54. I like turbulence on a plane ride.
55. Lilacs are my favorite flower
56. I have to play spider solitaire if I get on the computer.
57. Sometimes when I try to write all I really end up doing is staring at what I've already written before closing the document and taking a break.
58. My first memory is living in an apartment somewhere and pushing the Christmas tree off the balcony after Christmas.
59. It actually makes me sick when someone is pulling out the seeds of a pumpkin. I cannot stand the smell. But I like eating pumpkin seeds.
60. I HATE it when people leave shopping carts in the parking lot in random spots.
61. If I could have plastic surgery on anything it would be my chin.
62. I like driving.
63. I buy hair ties and take one out of the package and then lose the package.
64. Then the elastic wears out of my hair tie and I have to buy a whole new package.
65. I always put the lid down after being in the bathroom because I lived with Aunt Jane for three years.
66. When I get a house I'm having my own bathroom because I can't stand sharing with anyone.
67. I have crazy dreams.
68. I always tell my roommates about them in the morning.
69. My life would be miserable without my roommates and the rest of the girls in Normandy.
70. I chew gum when I'm running late and forget to brush my teeth.
71. I'm terrified of spending the winter in Idaho because the snow and I don't get along very well.
72. I like taking walks at night.
73. I love star gazing.
74. Camping is my favorite thing to do to "get away".
75. I miss the Quiner family more than I would miss oxygen if I was drowning.
76. I try to avoid wearing skirts as much as possible.
77. When I have to wear a skirt I wear shorts under it.
78. One of my favorite things about being Mormon is the fact temples GLOW!
79. I rarely ever wear jewelry.
80. Except for my CTR ring which is in French.
81. If I could retake any subject in school it would be Science.
82. I'm horrible at holding a job and I don't really know why.
83. I tell myself its because I like change.
84. Nothing cheers me up more than watching Ever After or The Swan Princess.
85. My first girl will be named Mirabel Ann and my first boy will be named Ross McKay after my brothers Ryan and Jack.
86. Sometimes I get the urge to name my kids after Disney prince's and princess's.
87. If I could be anywhere right now I would choose right where I am.
88. I eat about one meal a day and that's usually around ten at night before going to bed.
89. I still own pillowcases from when I was really little.
90. I love spring and fall.
91. I'm a Cancer and to a tee. I can be very shy but very outgoing too and I have really bad mood swings.
92. I love my dad's spaghetti sauce even though it has sausage in it.
93. I love peanut butter M&M's
94. I wish they still sold Fun Dip at 7-11
95. I don't care about what's "in style" I wear what I like.
96. I believe everyone should have a second chance and everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt.
97. Even on my very worst day when I scream that I wish I'd never let the missionaries into my apartment, I love being Mormon.
98. I believe you can't go wrong when your smiling.
99. I believe my Heavenly Father loves me even when I feel like no one else does.
100. I'm pretty excited about the whole getting my own planet thing.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Still Holding On
This week has been one of the most difficult since I got to Idaho. It has nothing to do with school or friends or boys. It just has to do with me, which in a way I think is worse. Everything has been going awesomely. Last week was really good for me academically. I got a B on a French test I studied hard for and I did all of my required homework. This week has been much the same as far as school goes (except I did miss an assignment for Book of Mormon).
But last week I started skipping meals. There wasn't a reason really, but then I noticed I was doing it and that's when the thoughts started. I hadn't heard them in my head for a while so it was quite a shock when one day last week I went to get something to eat because I had not eaten that day and it was almost 5. I got to the cupboard and all I could hear was And you had been doing so well. Look at you and how weak you are. You can't even go a whole day without stuffing your face. Do you know how fat you've gotten because you're lazy?
So I closed the cupboard and went to the bathroom and got on the scale and the voice said See I told you so. So I didn't eat. Then the next day I didn't eat until Miriam made me because she said it was in celebration of getting a B on my test. We ate in the new cafe in the MC and with all of that noise and with Miriam there was no voice and I could eat. But afterward I felt sick and selfish so that was the only meal I ate. Then on Saturday I ate a meal with Nicole and it was fast food and the voice just screamed at me. Sunday was fast Sunday and it was such a relief to not have to eat I just didn't. I didn't for most of the week. I had a yogurt once and a banana.
Yesterday I spent the entire day at lectures on eating disorders. They said eat what you're craving so you don't overeat and they taught us about intuitive eating so I had a bagel in between lectures and then on the way home I realized I was hungry again and I wanted another bagel so I got one. Then I got home and Nicole's not-boyfriend boyfriend was there and when I was about to eat the bagel he said "Wow that's a big appetite you have"
I completely and utterly broke down. I couldn't eat and I just sobbed and sobbed. So Karyn took care of me and then got Miriam and she helped me eat the bagel. Then Miriam and I made cookies for my French class. There was so much cookie dough from the one recipe I thought I would never be able to finish baking them all.
The really awful thing about all of this...I lost 10lbs and part of me wants to keep going.
But last week I started skipping meals. There wasn't a reason really, but then I noticed I was doing it and that's when the thoughts started. I hadn't heard them in my head for a while so it was quite a shock when one day last week I went to get something to eat because I had not eaten that day and it was almost 5. I got to the cupboard and all I could hear was And you had been doing so well. Look at you and how weak you are. You can't even go a whole day without stuffing your face. Do you know how fat you've gotten because you're lazy?
So I closed the cupboard and went to the bathroom and got on the scale and the voice said See I told you so. So I didn't eat. Then the next day I didn't eat until Miriam made me because she said it was in celebration of getting a B on my test. We ate in the new cafe in the MC and with all of that noise and with Miriam there was no voice and I could eat. But afterward I felt sick and selfish so that was the only meal I ate. Then on Saturday I ate a meal with Nicole and it was fast food and the voice just screamed at me. Sunday was fast Sunday and it was such a relief to not have to eat I just didn't. I didn't for most of the week. I had a yogurt once and a banana.
Yesterday I spent the entire day at lectures on eating disorders. They said eat what you're craving so you don't overeat and they taught us about intuitive eating so I had a bagel in between lectures and then on the way home I realized I was hungry again and I wanted another bagel so I got one. Then I got home and Nicole's not-boyfriend boyfriend was there and when I was about to eat the bagel he said "Wow that's a big appetite you have"
I completely and utterly broke down. I couldn't eat and I just sobbed and sobbed. So Karyn took care of me and then got Miriam and she helped me eat the bagel. Then Miriam and I made cookies for my French class. There was so much cookie dough from the one recipe I thought I would never be able to finish baking them all.
The really awful thing about all of this...I lost 10lbs and part of me wants to keep going.
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