Pawpaw

My Pawpaw (grandfather) has been sick since February. His mouth cancer came back and he decided he didn't want to do treatment anymore. At the beginning of April they started him on Hospice. I was able to fly home over the week break between semesters and see him one last time. I am really glad I got to see him, but I will never get used to watching someone die. I've done it more times than I care to remember and it does not get easier. I cannot imagine anything as painful as holding his hand and saying goodbye and knowing that's it.

As a Latter-Day Saint I believe in eternal life and in eternal families. I know what happens to me when I die, what happens to Miriam, Shane, my bishop. But what I didn't really understand was what happened to my pawpaw, my family. I knew part of the gospel was being able to be together forever, but so many people had told me that those who do not recieve the gospel in this life cannot reach the celestial kingdom. This past Sunday I finally asked my Bishop about it. He told me this, "Why would we do temple work if it's not possible for them to be exahalted? You need baptism to enter into the kingdom of God. That's all. To get the celestial kingdom you need to be sealed for eternity. If it wasn't possible for them to reach the celestial kingdom why would we do sealings for the dead? Why not just stop at baptism and confirmation? I have full faith that your grandfather can be exahalted and become a god."

It's amazing to me that seeing how much faith Bishop had could put my fears to rest and give me the faith I needed. It's amazing how someone elses testimony can affect your own. I think that's one of the reasons in everything we do we should emulate Christ because you never know who needs help in their testimony, who feels almost out of faith. We're not supposed to make it alone. We're supposed to hel each other. A testimony isn't meant to be kept hidden, it's meant to be shared.

"Oh, if I could teach you this one principle: a testimony is to be found in the bearing of it!" - Elder Boyd K. Packer

So today my mom texted me to tell me that they had taken pawpaw to the emergency room and it had something to do with his heart. He asked to go home and he's back home now. They've stopped giving him medicine, food, and water, but they upped his pain medication and he can up it as needed. That means it's only a matter of days now. So I texted my mom back and told her to tell him I love him and that he's the best man I know. She did, and I'm really glad he knows now. I really wanted to tell him when I saw him, but I just couldn't. It was too hard.

Since I thought I'd never be able to tell him in person I tried writing him a letter and a poem. I kind of feel like the poem is incomplete, but Miriam said she thought it was just fine and she liked it a lot. So here it is.

You taught me how to fish,
But all the while it was patience.
You taught me how to sit in silence,
But all the while it was thinking for myself.
You taught me how to pick and peel apples,
But all the while it was being self-sufficient.
You built me a cardboard playhouse;
You taught me to laugh.
You built me a green swing that hung from a tree;
You taught me to be free.

Weekend Procrastination

So I had my whole Saturday planned out and it involved lots of quality time at the library doing homework. Too bad that didn't happen.

I woke up took a shower and was getting ready to go to the gym (yes I showered before going to the gym) when Shane texted me. We ended up going to the gym together. Or, well, I went to the gym and he went swimming. I saw Kristen there and we talked the whole time and it was really nice. Then Shane and i came back to the apartment and we were going to have breakfast. I figured we'd call it a day after that and I would go the library and do my homework. But no, Shane had a brilliant plan.

So we rented the first 8 episodes of Prison Break, got pizza, went back to Shane's place, and watched five episodes on the projector.

Absolutely no homework was completed on Saturday. I figured I would just have to do a little bit on Sunday. Not all of it, but like my religion homework and maybe some reading. I got up, went to church, had a meeting with the bishop, went to our FHE brothers' place for lunch, went to Elder Bednar's talk, and came home. Then Shane came over and we made dinner and watched Beauty and the Beast. Then it was time to go to bed.

I got absolutely nothing done this weekend! Now I'm going to feel behind all week and I hate that. I know I have time to do the homework that needs to be done, but I like feeling ahead and not so overwhelemed. It'll be okay though. Maybe instead of reserving Saturday's for homework I should do it Friday during the day since I have so much time in between my two classes and before anything usually going on at night.

Hot Springs

Yesterday I only had one class, American Government, and New Testament was cancelled. I'm trying to go to the temple once a week because our bishop challenged us to and I thought going after my early morning class would be perfect and it was. I think it's the slowest I have ever seen the Rexburg temple. I got there around 9 and then I waited for Shane and we went in around 9:30. We only had to wait a few minutes before we could get dressed. Then it wasn't very long before they called Shane back to help with confirmations. They let him confirm me and then baptize me so I wasn't as scared as I normally am when I get in the water, but I was still pretty scared.

When we were walking back to the car Shane saw an old mission companion and he was getting married so we went over to say hi. Shane had been planning on going to his reception that night, but while we were at the wedding he got asked to go to the luncheon too so he was trying to decide what to get them as a wedding gift. I had one that I hadn't been able to afford shipping and so I said he could have it. We went back to the apartment and I gave it to him and then he left to get ready for the luncheon.


I took a nice long nap and then my roommates, Bekah and Katy, invited me to go to the hot springs with them and a few other people. We had a blast. I am so glad I decided to go. Plus it was a really good workout. When we got home we put in a movie, but I ended up going to bed before it was over. And that was my Friday night.

Schooling

So I have been to all but two classes by now. One because it's only on Thursdays and one because I just added it.

This semester I am taking:

Eng 218 - Creative Writing
Eng 370R - Women Writers on Writing
Rel 211 - New Testament
HFED 140 - Intro to Architecture and Interior Design
POLSC 110 - American Government

I dropped my French class today because I am just not ready for 201 so I am planning on auditing 102 so that I can keep practising and reviewing and then take 201 in the fall when I feel more comfortable in the class. So because I dropped it I had to scramble to find a 3 credit class because I have to have 15 credits for fast grad. Thus, I added American government. Shane said I'm going to have a lot of fun in that class, but I am going to have to study a lot because the tests are hard.

I love my New Testament class! I have Bro. Hammond again and I feel like I've come full circle because he was my first religion teacher when I got here last summer semester. He is such an amazing teacher.

My interior design class is going to be interesting and I am looking forward to it a lot. I know I'm going to learn so much.

I'm excited about my Creative Writing class as well. Today in class we all had to write a line of poetry on a piece of paper and we handed them to Bro. Stewart and he picked 16 and the class constructed a poem from them. I like it a lot. Plus the activity was a lot of fun. Here's the poem. I bolded my line.

Stone-cold Love

There’s a million ways for me to say this

Sands of time are wasteland only in my mind
In a world of allusion, I long to be
In the wily minds of men
The places where we hide

The blonde-headed duck dressed elegantly in plaid
Tickling curls under his lips
“Curses!” she cries as he drives out of sight

Jumping off the bottom stair, I fell among the clouds
Eyes, unpenetrated by darkness, light the way in a vast expanse
The snow gently powdered the flowers
Pastel shades of pink and yellow color the sky
Yesterday will come tomorrow after sunlight fades
Of this I am certain: I will not be mistaking love for anything else

My pet rock died today

Twinsies

So I got to talk to Miri today for almost an hour. I really miss her being here all the time. It's going to be quite an adjustment getting used to it I think. I'm definitely not as sad about it as I thought I would be. Before the end of winter semester every time I thought about Miri leaving I wanted to cry and when we said goodbye I almost got weepy, but I contained myself because I was on a bus. Now that I'm back at school though I just miss her, but I know that we're both doing what we need to be doing. I am so excited for her to go on a mission and I know she's going to be the best missionary ever!




My new roommates are really nice. I think I most click with Cassie (her home life was a lot like mine) and Orchid (she's a convert too!) My room roommate is named Hannah and it's her second semester and she's turning 19 soon. That makes me feel really old.

I've only been to one class so far, most of mine are on Tuesdays and Thursdays so once I've been to all of them I'll post about them.

Dallas

So currently I am sitting at gate C37 in the Dallas airport. It's dark and dreary outside, but I like the rain so it's not all the bothersome.

I was supposed to catch a flight from Dallas to Denver and then on to Salt Lake. However, the plane was delayed an hour, which meant I would miss my connection in Denver. Apparently though, all flights in Denver are being cancelled because of snow. So I talked to the ticket counter lady and she said there was a non-stop flight from Dallas to Salt Lake leaving at 12:35 and arriving at 2:25 so she put me on it. That means I'm still able to make the shuttle to Rexburg, which leaves at 3.

Allow me a moment to complain about flaky people. I had a ride back from Salt Lake and even a place to stay Friday night because they wanted to leave Saturday. All of these plans fell through however when they changed their mind leaving me to find not only a way home for myself, but for another firend who had been guaranteed a ride as well. It proceeded to get worse from there trying to find a ride home. I suppose it's okay now because I have a ticket for the worst ride in the world, the shuttle, and I was able to find my friend a ride, but still people suck.

My mom (Martha) has all the pictures from this week so I don't have any to post, but we did go out to The Cheesecake Factory last night and had a blast. I even bought my mom a drink. It was a lot of fun. We just ordered cheesecake and drinks. I got some sort of virgin mango thingy and mom got the georgia peach. As for cheesecake mom got the new blueberry one and I got the lemon raspberry creme. They were both amazing.

Anyway I need to go because we should be board soon.

Sunday Dinner

So in our apartment one of us always cooks Sunday dinner for everyone. Usually we make it a big thing and invite some of our FHE brothers and Shane. This past Sunday was no different except that it was my turn to cook the meal. It was my first time being in charge of the whole thing because last time Kristen did most of the work and I just made the key lime pie. I really wanted to do French dishes so I looked up recipes online. Since I live in Rexburg that automatically got rid of 3/4 of the recipes because of exotic ingredients. I ended up making french onion soup.

This isn't the soup I made, but it looked almost exactly like this. I know! I'm surprised too!

Miriam made french bread so everything was made fresh and from scratch. I think that always makes everything better.

For dessert we had flan. Or at least that's what the website said it was the full title of the dish is Traditional Medieval French Custard Tarte, or in French, Tarte Médiévale.

Mine looked like this too! I was really freaking out though when I pulled it out of the oven because I thought I had burnt and ruined it. Apparently I hadn't and it's supposed to look like that.

It was a really good Sunday and I even got to take a nap on the floor while the others watched The Emperor's New Groove. Then we had a deep, meaningful discussion on marriage because somehow we always end up talking about that. Hmm, I wonder why.

Anyway, here are the recipes for Sunday's luncheon/dinner thing.

French Onion Soup
- 1 tbsp butter
- 2 tbsp olive oil
- 4 large onions (about 1 1/2 pounds), thinly sliced*
- 2-4 garlic cloves, finely chopped
- 1 tsp sugar
- 1/2 tsp dried thyme
- 2 tbsp flour
- 1/2 cup dry white wine**
- 8 cups chicken or beef broth
- 2 tbsp brandy (optional)
- 6-8 thick slices French bread, toasted
- 1 garlic clove
- 12 ounces of Swiss cheese, grated

*I bought four we used like one and a half. The onions I got were HUGE thought.
**I found this great website that lists non-alcoholic substituions whenever a recipe calls for alcohol. In this case 1/2 c of white wine equals a 1/2 c of chicken broth and 1 tbsp lemon juice.

In a large heavy saucepan or flameproof casserole, heat the butter and oil over medium-high heat. Add the onions and cook for 10-12 minutes until they are softened and beginning to brown. Add the garlic, sugar and thyme and continue cooking over medium hear for 30-35 minutes until the onions are well browned, stirring frequently.
Sprinkle over the flour and stir until well blended. Stir in the white wine and broth and bring to a boil. Skim off any foam that rises to the surface, then reduce the heat and simmer gently for 45 minutes. Stir in the brandy, if using.
Preheat the broiler. Rub each slice of toasted French bread with the garlic clove. Place six or eight ovenproof bowls on a baking sheet and fill about three-quarters full with the onion soup.
Float a piece of toast in each bowl. Top with grated cheese dividing it evenly, and broil about 6 inches from the heat for about 3-4 minutes until the cheese begins to melt and bubble.

Tarte Médiévale
- 4 cups Milk
- 4 Eggs
- 2/3 cup Granulated Sugar
- 1/4 cup Cornstarch (optional)
- Pinch of Nutmeg
- 1 - 2 tsp. Cinnamon
- Butter and flour for Pie dish
- 1 Pie or Tarte Crust

Preheat oven to 450°F
1. Combine milk and sugar in a pot and gently bring to a boil. Remove from heat and let cool.
2. Mix cornstarch with 3/4 cup of water and then stir into warm milk. Put milk back on a low heat, and stirring constantly bring to a boil and then remove from heat.
3. Beat the eggs well, and then gently stir into the milk until homogenous.
4. Butter and flour pie dish. Roll out pie crust and place in dish. Pour in milk mixture and bake for 30 minutes. Let cool off before serving.

Crust Recipe
- 1 1/3 cup Flour
- 2 Eggs
- 4 oz. Butter (chilled!)
- 1 tbsp. Granulated Sugar
- Pinch of Salt

1. Mix salt, sugar, and flour.
2. Cut chilled butter into small pieces and mix into flour with finger tips. Stop working batter once it looks like "sand".
3. Make a well and pour in eggs. Incorporate into flour using your fingers and a spatula.
4. Once homogenous, form a ball, place on a floured surface and knead for 10 seconds. Reshape into a ball, roll out with a rolling pin, and refrigerate for 30 minutes before rolling out.*

* So since this direction is almost cryptic we chilled it in the shape of a ball and then rolled it out.